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Posts Tagged ‘subject-object’

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UPSTREAM

As the tides flow in and out,
the voices, withering and young, flow around.

We ride the oldest of things against the flow,
back up to a source where the stolen thing
is hidden unknown to any, unknown to all.
Forgotten forgotten, unnamed even,
taken before three days seen, even.

All these places are places and more than places,
more than time, more than ciphers, more than mystery.
Follow one thread of meaning and you will, for sure, tangle the cloth,
lose the weave, the weft and pattern.

To hold in your hand such a bright wriggling thing
and stop yourself from any grasping, from holding it steady,
from pressing the life and scintillation from it.
Mud and leaves it will turn to, where now it is dancing gold and laughing.

A pattern pressed into mud: perfect impression.
But breathe too hard, even, and it will smudge and dissolve.
That is how fine our truth is, how the names and places and tales wriggle.
Take one road but do not forget the others.
Take one small thread end and tease it out, like smoke, like water,
like the music of gnats.

Neither too big, nor too small, you must dissolve everything you are
and quietly wait, memorising the names and their genealogies.
How snow falls; how fire and promises are one;
how darkness carries its weight;
how the gods mould themselves and learn new dances;
make promises that will never break –
singing bones and feather dust in dark halls.

As soon as you are sure of something, let it go.
Do not hold on to what is not yours ( and nothing is yours).

To know what is, you must know what is not.
To know what it is not, you must know what it is.
Lose sight of this and you will fall down long centuries wondering why.

As soon as it was named, it became lost.
As soon as it became separate, it was no longer known.
Moon tides swing to the bright prison where the river bends,
the crooked one, the turning wheel, the water road.

Say the words, say the words, until the words grow wings and fly away.
The sound of their whistling pinions will diminish, diminish, diminish,
and now the wind will rise and bear you up into oceanic moonlight.
If you call me by my name, you do not know me.
If you call me by my name, how can I answer?
If you call me by my name, you have learned nothing.

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The constellations of stars have the lustre of the blazing deadly fire,
But they have the mudras of bestowing boons
And freedom from fear in their hands…….

Here is the thing:
We seem, we define,
We come to terms with the world,
Plan our exits,
all with strong threads
Of memory.

Yet nowhere,
(Despite the most fervent wishes,
Despite the sharp snick of scalpels,
The dull drum of scans, the following
And cataloguing of nerve and fireburst),
Nowhere,
has
one memory
ever,
Ever been found,
in the skull’s bone world.

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There
In the chamber of lapis lazuli,
The rivers have icy chill waters.
The waters in the lakes have sparkling lustre
Free from dust.
The lakes are adorned with cranes, swans
And lotuses,…

The tragic analogies: library,
Telephone exchange, computer,
Holographic image, desperately
Conjured, falter and fail.

We are, it seems,
Elsewhere.

(This cold wind through dry leaves,
This long cry on a starless black night).

Though perhaps,
Firstly, we should consider
The heart, the bones,
The muscles –
Closer, dearer to us
Than this
Chattering doubter,
This artiste,
This hogger of limelights.

A matter of attention,
These thoughts:
Caged, wheeling
Through sawdust,
Pink-toed, sharp-eyed.
Listen more deeply
To the language
Of spleen and liver,
Of knee and tarsus.
The rippled tides
Of our borrowed waters,
Fountains, rivers,
Estuaries of blood and lymph.

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To follow every signpost must lead to endless confusion.
To know a destination
Or to never care.

(Cool winds rock the hedgerows,
Piling in from the north:
A bank of fast cloud.)

There is one, some say a goddess, some a shepherdess, or, I say, a mouth of greenest laughter, who gives a taste of other memories, other lives ( a bouquet of burning skulls, a posy, a displaced, replaced mirror).

Attempting
to locate comfort.
(Rain slaps across windows
Bright now with sunrise).

He should then meditate upon his own soul and the form of the deity, without distinction between the two. He should sit in the padmasana posture facing the east. He shall sit steadily without thinking of anything else….

Endless are the conversations of sages,
the warring of equations,
the battle for the ending of knowledge,
the prize of certainty.
The sage spouts endless words
commentating on the nature of silence,
Each scratch a mudra,
Each splutter, mantra.

(Silent ground turns sunwise,
Sparrows leap the bare branches,
Knowing just one thing,
And are happy.)

He shall take the eight groups of letters in the navel, in the heart, and the throat, at the root of the heart, and on the head….he shall place the letters on the surface of the Earth in the same order…
.

If the head is void of memory,
if the heart has forgotten all
but the rhythm of continuance,
if the blood does not shudder
and sing the times past in molecular waves,
in electric sighs, remember, remember,
reconstruct, reconstrue, imbibe,
fill the empty spaces, the vestibules,
the ventricles, the wind chambers,
the echoing vaults,
where shall we place the shining, golden letters,
the sounds of,
footprints of,
evidence for continuity?

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These fragments, shattered mirror,
A thousand views
Of a world unimagined.
(We, perhaps, that mirror,
Erroneously supposing corporeality,
Intuiting infinite distance, profound volumes
Where all is simple reflecting surface from elsewhere.
We, unrippled, unmoved, medium, ether, field).
Here, though, that grand error:
Not being something does not equate
With being nothing.
A simple matter of perspective
Resolving paradox.

But how great a thing is this, even the possibility!
That memory resides elsewhere.
Not locked in brain, not stored, not filed,
Not embedded.
Worlds turned inside out,
Talking back, we belonging again,
To the beyond, to the weather,
Enfolded.

The movement of birds in the firmament is not observed distinct from the sky. The movement of aquatic beings in water is not discerned distinct from water. Similarly the great conduct of noble-souled ones is not distinct from their environment.

——

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Occasionally I dip into Rupert Sheldrake’s “The Science Delusion” as a remedy for the bitter excesses of Big Science. Though the processes and structures that lay down memory are somewhat identified, all attempts to locate memories in the brain have so far failed. The concept of molecular memory ‘stored’ seems deeply flawed. The idea of a filing system requires another layer of memory to remember how to locate the memory, and so on ad infinitum….. It can, of course, hardly be countenanced that ‘we’ might exist beyond our physical bodies, one dogma too far for the tortuous illogics of materialist science.. But if it were found to be so……!!!!

The quoted sections are from the Brahmanda Purana, the section on meditation on the letters and mantras of the Goddess, Lalita. The Puranas, like all Vedic texts, always seem to me to be precise mathematical and cosmological equations in the form of complex symbolic mythological imagery…

The art is a wittering reflection of memory, action, and suspended process, going somewhere unmapped….

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SKY RIVER

Three days now the sky
Has been a rushing river of airs.
Caught in its roar
The bright moon day by day dissolves.
Now a thin cold lip,
An edge of ice fast melting.

Here’s a line, here’s an image,
Bold and clear, easy to recall,
Easy to frame.
But gone and shattered,
A leaping fish, up and shining;
A crystal hung in the sun
Never the same patterns of spinning colour;
A stream, a burble of tumbling,
One melody caught but then lost,
A fugue of endless forgettings.

So, the points, the main points,
Quickly before they slide, again, away.
What and where is the wind when it is not blowing?
What and how is a river when it is not flowing?
What and why is the mind when it is not full of words?
How can we say anything is certain
When we fail even to remember
Our passionate dreams from the fading dark of dawn?

Nothing seems fixed in the buffeting swirl of mind’s river.
I am the possessor of the sight
Of a juggler with knives and doves
Enraptured, disbelieving, horrified.
But I is an eye
In a peacock’s tail,
A ripple and splash
Over a river’s wide shore.
My certainty, no more than that cloud,
Breathing and gone as it races southwards,
Seawards, forgotten on the horizon, no longer itself,
Melted, merged, a long sigh.

Hold here, hold here, anchored.
That is, perhaps,
To miss the point.
Consider this elegant and judicious thought!
Consider this cloud, this sparkle of light,
This aeolian harp. This sound
That comes and that goes
( in the forest is there even a roaring
With no ear to hear it?).
There is something,
But it seems nothing when held.
There seems something,
But it is only a dreaming of numbers and probabilities.
The wise having spoken,
The rabble clamour and grab those chiselled phrases
(lacking any memories of their own).

The wisdom of mankind:
A moon melting away into shade,
A wind rocking the rafters,
Shaking the valleyed woods,
Inchoate, a chord.
Hold, and it is lost, dismembered, forgotten.

The colours of the dawn: a sequence of shifts, no moments,
No savoured fragments. Only as the blink
Of an eye, an inability to keep
Attention,
A distraction of impressions.
Mind, a movement of itself
Outward into itself,
A brash Mozart
Of improvised narcissism.
If you are not now looking at me
Then what am I?
Give me worth
Or I am less
Than dust
On the tongue.

Dissect and sever
Dream from sleep,
Sleep from waking,
Sense from feeling,
Real from fantasy.
Dam the air, dam the stream,
Divide the slow curves,
Tree shaded,
From the racing weir,
Rock shouting and white.

This moment of perfect sky,
Three woodpigeons buoyed and floating
Down to the small green field.
A rip of blue.
Two gulls distantly weaving.
Cloud shifting from grey to pink,
Teased out,
Carded fine and white
Through the teeth of the fast cold.

Recording moments:
A needle stuck
Repeating the same few bars, the
Same few, the same.
Or a rabble of squabbling voices,
A heckling audience,
Swaying faces in the dark.
A consensus of insanity
Taken to be, of course, sanity.

The sky is pearl and golden.
Three day’s wind
Has smoothed out the light,
Has rubbed the hills green and smooth,
Has dissolved the moon.
That is all.

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lingam1

RAG AND BONE MAN

 

Misdirection.

Frantically waving

The world tries to warn :

Going the wrong way!

Looking out

When you should be

Looking in.

 

In the palace

Broken debris accumulates.

 

(Holding a red, wriggling

Worm of thought.

Articulated, reticulated,

Sinuous, slippery.

Transfixed now,

Sectioned.

 

It oozes

Phonemes,

It oozes

Pheromones.

Colours of, shapes of,

Moments of, pain of,

Pleasure of.

The demon (daemon)

Of Meaning,

No Archon this,

Nothing but Choronzon –

Crowley’s chaos beast.

Bright bubbles of edge

Bursting into void.

Clasping reality:

The cliff-face, wave-foam,

Everything

And nothing revealed.)

 

In the palace,

Silent, deserted,

Debris put by:

Collected are souvenirs,

Remembrances, clues,

Identifiers, histories,

Reasons, threats, excuses.

 

What has been rejected,

Labelled unacceptible,

Exerts as much gravitational pull

As the central proud combustion

Of signposted identity.

At the edge

We place the dark gods,

The Titans, the giants from before.

The ones whose names

We have all but forgotten,

The ones of the earth,

The child-eaters,

The self-generators.

 

With stick and staff

The thick-lensed caricatures,

Bewebbed stuttering scholars,

Chemical smudged whitecoats,

Steadfastly measure and dissect.

Never looking within

Never stirring the dusty dragons

The leering, prancing obscenities

The brilliant but quite mad molecules.

For, tell me if I am mistaken,

Is not the person but a bombastic dictator?

No democracy there, no credence given

To heart or lung or liver.

A hijacking by a handful

Of slick, white myelin-sheathed johnnies,

Serotonin spivs, smart mouthed,

Cocky seen-it-alls, know-it-alls.

 

These our trusted advisors,

These our judges, our jurors

Pretending po-faced objectivity,

Arbiters of reality,

Politic grandparents

Guiding us away

From the dark corners

The guts in the cellar

The stains and axe marks

The awkward questions

The nightmare realities

Of distinct extinction

Irreparable re-examination

Of priorities.

 

The patient sublimates.

The patient projects.

The psychopath, quite reasonably,

Believes a distinct view

Nothing but a gift, a duty.

 

Fearing that anathema

Of the Irrational,

The horror of insanity,

The embarrasment of pettiness

That dwells within,

A roil of unscientific, subjective

Oddness

(we all know it, we all know it

How can we not know it?)

Sweeping the dirty

And the improper continually

Under the carpet,

Rearranging the tired flowers,

A quite flick of the duster,

A spray of masking wholesomeness.

 

Spending nation’s worth

Probing the fractions of matter,

Qualifying,

quantifying statistical expectations,

Mathematically generated creatures,

Galactic searchings,

Subatomic manhunts

Whilst

Heroically

Ignoring

That one thing

We can call ours,

The architecture

Of thought,

Pulse of Memory,

Symbiosis of consciousness,

Monster of imagination,

The flicker of

Inward sound,

Power

Behind the throne.

We cannot, m’lud,

Declare the patient sane

Nor their acts judicious

Nor their perceptions true

Lest the evidence is forthcoming

From the Defence.

 

Is the ghost a demon?

Is it a god?

By their acts shall ye know them

By the world they allow

Not by their advertising campaigns,

Not by their multiple-choice questionaires

Not by their glossy manifestos.

 

Not by anything

But the evidence of their own,

Lonely, determined dive

Past the mechanoid elves,

Past the phosphorescent jellyfish

Past the trembling glory

Past the irrefutible

Past the last possible excuse

Past the only reason

Past the words and past the silence

At last to the bright halls,

The shining paths,

The alien, familiar gardens.

 

I hung for nine nights

I hung for nine days

Upon the World Tree.

Naked, I reached downwards,

Screaming I took up the runes,

Word upon word

Word to wellness

World was woven,

One Eye am I,

One view, completed.

concentric5

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